Saturday, December 14, 2013

Query letter feedback please!

Hi there!

So I have completely revamped the query letter I send to agents after the mentors of the Pitchwars contest gave me feedback in my rejection emails.  I am hoping you can tell me if you think this would be a good inside cover of a book that makes you want to read it! Please comment below and let me know your thoughts!

Dear agent,
I am seeking representation for my debut middle grade novel MOON DAUGHTER RISING (32,200 words). Twelve year old, Native American Annalee has no idea her missing dad is a captive in the spirit world, or that she is a descendant of the Man in the Moon.  But when a man-eating, abominable ice witch pursues her, she discovers both facts.  Armed with a crescent talisman and aided by new-found friends, she sets out to rescue her dad.
If the witch captures Annalee, her cruelty will rule both worlds with eternal chaos and fear.  If Annalee kills the witch, her dad will die too.  Outwitting the witch will force Annalee to face the truth of her heritage and embrace the spirit of the moon daughter rising within.
MOON DAUGHER RISING is rooted in Micmac tribal myth and culture, and features several of their legends.  It may appeal to fans of Bruce Coville’s UNICORN CHRONICLES and Madeleine L’Engle’s A WRINKLE IN TIME.  Native American tribes have been a fascination of mine ever since visiting my grandfather in the southwestern U.S. and experiencing the Casa de Verde cliff dwellings as a child.  There seems to be a major lack of novels that invite young readers into their worlds.  I hope you see this novel as a solution to this deficit.
Thank you for your time and consideration,

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